MYTH IN my culture has it that if you look beautiful and radiant while carrying, then it is definitely a girl and if all the other awful pregnancy side-effects catch up with you then you are carrying a boy. I reject that, I mean what are we trying to say here about boys?
Sadly though it was true for Bukhanye. BOY DID I GO THROUGH THE MOST PHYSICALLY! My colleagues still laugh at how big my swollen feet were, my older sister couldn’t stop laughing at how dark certain parts of my body had become and even now when I look at the last two months of my last pregnancy in pictures, I have no idea who that girl was.
Naturally – okay no let me not generalize. As a woman though it has always been my strongest desire to raise a woman. I remember being thoroughly convinced Bukhanye was a girl. Like I would hear nothing and I would pray for nothing else. Truth is part of this came from a fear of raising a man. There’s so much that has gone wrong in our society regarding the male image and as a mother to a boy so much rests on your shoulders to ensure that at the very least you do your part for your son and to, in a sense, ease the ills of society (if I’m even phrasing that correctly). However a large part of it is I wanted someone to be a girl with, someone who was going to go beyond where I’d been as a woman and break even more boundaries, go smashing into male worlds un-apologetically, I wanted a wing girl, in a tiara and a suite. I wanted a mini me and I wanted her for all the dreams of her I had had as a little girl playing mommy to my dolls. The want was such a huge part of me I could never see it not happening until God decided to flip my whole world around.
Since having my son I want more sons. HAHAHAHA!!! Strange thing life. When I found out I was pregnant again the one thing I saw vividly was me as a mother to boys. Like I’d be the lioness with my little lion cubs. Naturally now when I think baby I think Bukhanye and being a mom to a boy I’ve automatically learnt how to respond to boys more. He may not be a girl but all the dreams I had for my girl child have automatically transferred onto him and I see him marching in uncharted territories and claiming back what is his and mine!
So it was no wonder then that I saw brothers in arms, causing havoc and taking names. I was ready to mother boys.
But this God being hey!?
Lo and Behold, my prayer is finally answered. My princess is finally on the way. The joy in my heart when I found out can never be expressed. The day I found out was a wet summers day and I knew there and then that heaven had watered down blessings on me and I am forever delighted.
And this is definitely the perfect duo, of course the prince comes before the princess, it all makes sense now. I can’t wait to watch these two grow together and dare to live in the world while changing it. Oh and of course I can’t wait for all the other girly stuff as well, dress up, make up, relationship advice, shoe shopping and the likes!
Truly I have been blessed.
XOXO